Real life really has a way of getting in the way of living the life we want. It dishes out problems and obstacles left and right, and I’m not an exception. The last time that I posted, I faced disease in the family; my mom got hospitalized to get dialysis for her failing kidneys. How I wish that she’s better now.
Sadly, my mother is in a better place now. When I last posted, she just went into a hospital to get dialysis treatment. It helped her a bit, and she showed signs of getting better. In fact, her doctors told her that they would release her after a few days. However, she had a heart attack two days before the day that the doctors planned to discharge her. Her heart stopped beating for 18 minutes, and the doctors were able to revive her. Unfortunately, she passed away two days after the heart attack.
I was with her when she died. All day, I was trying to lower her fever down. When night came, I was still trying to make the fever go away when I noticed that her breathing became unsteady. They came in irregular intervals, and they sounded shallow. While she was drawing her final breaths, I kept on telling her that I loved her. Tears were already streaming down my face as I kept stroking her hair.
It seems that my motivation to write died with her. I sure hope that by publishing this post, I can get some of my motivation back. I know that I won’t stop writing. I might pause–for a really long time–but I’ll get back to it.